It's Saturday afternoon, and I sat down by my self in the corner of this food court in Pejaten Village. I feel so relax and happy because I can update my blog and I'm going to write what happened to me for the last couple of months.
I met my teacher and he's doing capoeira with his friends, well I didn't say hello to him. I'm just seeing him from the shade.
Recently, I feel so much relax and peaceful in facing all my life problems. I think it's because the meditation that I do two or three times in a week. I fee like I can control my energy and shooing all those negative thoughts that it's usually hanging around in my head, and it made me has a clear thought. So, it give some good effects to my self. Less angry and less emotional.
I've been struggling for my bad depression since August last year, since I decided to break up my communication with him. Now, I can see it clearly and now I can move on and planning about my next steps.I became so anxious and temperament because I regretted what I did. I wish I can turn back time and stopping all those lousy behavior. Those horrible three months was a nightmare for me. I didn't want to socialize with others, I didn't want to share my feelings, full of emotional, mood swings, angryness and even it's better for me not to live anymore. I deactivated my facebook and my instagram so that I didn't feel jealous to those friends whose having all those better life than me. You know what? Less social media made me happier since you realized you don't have to compare your own life with others. I only used instagram and whatsapp now, that's more than enough from me.
And the days became worst when I had my term break holiday and my dad asked me to go back home. I thought it's only an usual holiday, but my dad and my brother planned to propose my brother's GF. I was so angry at that time, how came they did it to me. They should talk to me first before they got that decision because my brother going to skip me as he's going to marry soon.
The next problem was when I would to renewal my contract in my recent working place I heard uncomfortable gossip about me, so that I took that emotional decision to resign from that place. I was regretted it since I haven't got a new job yet. Luckily, the HRD asked me to stay back and yeaah I took it for now since I don't want to be a jobless after Lebaran.
I'v got two interview but I still haven't got the news yet. I hope there will be a good news from me tho. I did all my best and it's going to be Allah decision at last. Whatever the result is I know it is the best from me. Insya Allah :)
I met my teacher and he's doing capoeira with his friends, well I didn't say hello to him. I'm just seeing him from the shade.
Recently, I feel so much relax and peaceful in facing all my life problems. I think it's because the meditation that I do two or three times in a week. I fee like I can control my energy and shooing all those negative thoughts that it's usually hanging around in my head, and it made me has a clear thought. So, it give some good effects to my self. Less angry and less emotional.
I've been struggling for my bad depression since August last year, since I decided to break up my communication with him. Now, I can see it clearly and now I can move on and planning about my next steps.I became so anxious and temperament because I regretted what I did. I wish I can turn back time and stopping all those lousy behavior. Those horrible three months was a nightmare for me. I didn't want to socialize with others, I didn't want to share my feelings, full of emotional, mood swings, angryness and even it's better for me not to live anymore. I deactivated my facebook and my instagram so that I didn't feel jealous to those friends whose having all those better life than me. You know what? Less social media made me happier since you realized you don't have to compare your own life with others. I only used instagram and whatsapp now, that's more than enough from me.
And the days became worst when I had my term break holiday and my dad asked me to go back home. I thought it's only an usual holiday, but my dad and my brother planned to propose my brother's GF. I was so angry at that time, how came they did it to me. They should talk to me first before they got that decision because my brother going to skip me as he's going to marry soon.
The next problem was when I would to renewal my contract in my recent working place I heard uncomfortable gossip about me, so that I took that emotional decision to resign from that place. I was regretted it since I haven't got a new job yet. Luckily, the HRD asked me to stay back and yeaah I took it for now since I don't want to be a jobless after Lebaran.
I'v got two interview but I still haven't got the news yet. I hope there will be a good news from me tho. I did all my best and it's going to be Allah decision at last. Whatever the result is I know it is the best from me. Insya Allah :)
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